Monday, November 22, 2010

Monday Musings

Yesterday began early with a visit to care for a Senior Chocolate Lab named Emma. Beautiful girl with grey on her muzzle and circling her cheerful sparkley eyes. She adores playing fetch with a tennis ball. Truly a delight to pet sit.

Then back home to get ready for church.

After Church, back home to quick make chicken pot pie and Southern Buttermilk Coconut pie (with heavy cream!!)

Then back to church to do childcare for any choir families practicing for our Church's annual Christmas Messiah musical.

Then over to mama and dad's to find my sister and her daughter, and a big surprise, my brother had driven up from SC....all there to visit with mom. We had urged my brother to come now instead of this coming weekend. Yes it's that doubtful. We are waiting now.

Then left there to go home and change clothes and head back out to do one final visit with Precious Emma for the weekend.

Then headed back home and spoke with hubby who was on his trek back across Ohio, Indiana, Illinois, and into Iowa after a weekend with family.

Talked to my brother on his trip back home to he needed to talk about my moms' condition. He knew now why we had begged him to come.

Talked to my hubby again to make sure he was staying awake and getting through the frustrations of toll roads!

Talked to my sister til 11:30, who called after she got back home to High Point.

Final call with hubby when he arrived back to Iowa City. Hung up at 12:50 am.

Fast Forward 6am...I hear a pst pst pst in the darkness...Justin wants to know where my flashlight is. He is taking off earlier than I had known, because his roommate had called and wanted a pickup from the airport in Wilmington. He was checking under his hood before he took off.

I get up before he leaves to get a hug and give last second instructions on a different way he is taking back. (country back roads)

My daughter is up and leaving EARLY for work today...Jonny is already gone to work for his usual Monday morning 5 am shift. Leaves me and Kam the man at home.

The house is quiet and still in the darkness. I grab some coffee and come to check in for any Monday morning posts.

I think of all that's going on. A new part of my journey in this life. Watching one of my beloved parents travelling the last stages of life on this earth. It is something you know will come, but something you don't like to watch. Especially if it is drawn out. The emotions become so raw. The body feels tiredness, and yet you couldn't even possibly complain as you watch the two who have been through 50+ years together face the path with such grace.

Thank you for your prayers. Knowing with certainty that there are people who have never even met me, and yet they say a prayer for my family as we face this moment, precious and priceless. What wonderful hearts are beating in the bodies of beautiful sisters out there.

I am thankful for the sisterhood. I am grateful to be one of those women. To be made in the softer image of God that makes us empathizing, intuitive, sensitive, and nurturing. So necessary. Truly all characteristics of our Father's image.

And today I am thankful for the stronger side of the man, made in the stronger image of the Father. The rough/tough, courageous, powerful, protective, providing, and sometimes fierce side of God.

I am grateful for my dad who has been this and, as he takes on the role of nurturer and caregiver for my mom in her final days.
I am grateful for my Kurt, who is tackling great hurdles and challenges to do hard things, and pursue... better and best.... for our family.

I watch my parents and realize my dad has to say goodbye...before he really wants to.
I realize that even in the hardest moments in life, God is still shaping, molding, changing, and growing us into who HE wants us to be as we spend eternity to come with Him. He wants us to be totally dependent and committed to HIM, above kindred and goods.

Life is Good, Life is Hard, Life is truly God...predestined, planned, perfected, and
permanent in the end in our homeland of Heaven. Pilgrims we are until that day. All of us will make the final steps on the path God charted individually for each one, and when we step over the threshold from earth's domain to Heaven's awaiting gates, what a day it shall be.

Until then we can only wait....and anticipate....the day.


Sandy said...

I think of your mom often, Julie, and ask the
Lord to bring a peace and comfort to her mind.
I think of your dad too, and pray for his
strength and peace. And, having gone through
this with my dear dad, I know how you feel as
a child seeing your mom like this. It's hard
beyond words. But God...
How would we make it through anything if not
for Him?

Julie Harward said...

What a busy day! Thanks for sharing all of have a great Thanksgiving :D

Privet and Holly said...

Your faith, your
grace and your
beautiful heart
all lift me up
this morning, dear
sweet Julie. You
are so right....a
new chapter....but
it's always hard
to close the book
on one we have so
cherished and enjoyed.
I will continue to
keep you close in
spirit and prayer.
Holding your hand
from the frosty North!
xx Suzanne

Dianna said...

Praying for you and grateful for the visits that were made to your mamma by your siblings, Dear Heart.

To answer your question...this is a week that I gladly surrender to hubby that he can enjoy himself out in the woods. For him, it is about much more than just "hunting the deer" is also a time of quiet solitude before the Lord. Should the Lord see fit to bless him with something, I'll gladly put it in the freezer and on the table! :-)

Hugs coming your way.

Theresa said...

I read this post on my way home from Savannah! I tried to comment but my IPhone wouldn't cooperate! I feel your pain so truly! I have lost both of my Parents and know how bad it hurts! My Mother passed away in her sleep and my Daddy passed away in Hospice! When my Mama passed away, I had my Dad to take care of and that I did! When my Daddy went to be with Jesus, my heart broke into a million pieces. He and I were so close and I LOVED him so much! He knew it and that is what I hold on to! Keep the faith, God is working his plan and we just have to trust in that! Give them all a big HUG from me! I love you my friend and I am praying for all of you!

Anonymous said...

this is just like you Julie we should be giving you words of wisdom and comfort but instead you are giving us such incredible words of wisdom, you are amazing and both of those parents sure raised a wonderful woman.We think of you and your parents often and of course your whole family. Hope that Marine got back home safe and sound and that Kurt will be home with you very soon. nancy settel

Mari said...

I sure am thankful for you, as you seem to be traveling my path just ahead of me and lighting my way. You make it sound so much more eloquent than I ever could. I sure appreciate your honesty, positive spirit, and encouragement. Today I am feeling numb, lifeless, tired and like there is just nothing left of me. I know it's a phase and I trust God to snap me out of it. Thursday my man comes home, even if for a brief weekend. But he's gonna be here in the flesh, and I know hugs will be plentiful!!

Praying for you.
Love, Me

Anonymous said...

Oh my!--You sure had a busy day.

Your post was such a blessing and encouragement to me because you are taking something so painful and praising the Lord in the midst of it.

Blessings and Hugs!

CACHANILLA73 said...

Oh dear Julie, here You are comforting our hearts when Yours need comforting. Yes, we are pilgrims in this world until the moment we meet with Our Lord. I lost my dear Dad almost 11 years ago, it was all of a sudden, I know the pain, the emptiness but Our Sweet Jesus was and is with me. You know we pray for you and your loved ones.
Hugs my dear sister.


billypandnikkysmom said...

Prayers & hugs...letting go is never easy. I'll keep your mom in my prayers & send hugs to you. Love ya.